Friday, July 31, 2009

Hearts throb. gentle. in vain.

There are times
I find
my heart throbs
gently, in vain

There are signs
I know
when my heart breaks,
brutally in pain

It is because
I am alone
and have none
to be with me.

It is because
I am free
I know how to be.

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

Saturday, July 25, 2009


I forgot to breathe
and somewhere
I forgot to be

I neglected myself
my very essence
held captive
by worry and fear

I forgot to breathe
to be so carefree
To dance with the wind
to live as I once knew how

God, help me
teach me to remember
show me something new
remind me to breathe

When a love was
snatched from me
my heart left my chest
and my life left me alone

But now I remember life
even without love
that life that worked its magic
and then taught, brought me love

I want to dance again, dear wind.
oh, sun, teach me to laugh again
dear waters, teach me to talk
oh night, teach me to whisper

Life, teach me
Show me again how to be
and Love, come to me
introduce us once again

Life has taught me to breathe
Day has taught me to smile
Laughter will soon show his face
Ah, how I welcome life and love!

I've missed you so!

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

Thursday, July 23, 2009


Why do I lack?
Where do I falter?
My words blot black
My dream: my assaulter

I hide from the light
I seek refuge in the stars
My future was so bright
But now dreams are so far

I dare not look through my eyes
I find I fear the very thing I sought
So I hide beneath night's guise
to eclipse the fear with which I'm fraught

My eyes are dark with night
My smile, forgotten but by moon's arc
By day I disremember my plight
But night makes wounds grow stark

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

Friday, July 17, 2009

Color Pulse

There is love in my heart
a sound
a song
a taste of sweet colors

Chords crash through my mind
A rainbow hides 'neath my eyelids
I feel light melting from my fingers
Sound spraying through my mind

Close your eyes!
Black canvas all around
Sprayed full with life
formed full by passion's eye

A song beats through my heart
it claps about my ears
I see the sound in full color
I feel the song in deepest depth

I have no way to express the song
for no music do I play
The song is what I see 
The sound is color, the notes manifest

The rhythm of  life
longs to be birthed by a vessel
The song that longs to be seen, heard
is trapped because of deaf ears

The breath of the ages
The song all of nature sings
is made mute
by our untrained, unseeing eyes

The colors of the sky's pulse
never pierce our conscience eye
The synesthetic throb of the worlds
is drowned out by our counter-babel

My eyes know, and open to see
What songs the world sings
My heart is open to the pulse all 'round me 
In it, I will thrive with life

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Mushrooms and Painted Skies

I find myself sitting on the brick steps in front of a lovely old house. The house is two-story, painted green, with knick-knacks and a few metal-wrought tables and chairs decorating the porch. Up a set of well-worn stairs, a cozy coffee shop is tucked away. There, the walls are painted warm colors, paintings are hung, and scattered everywhere. A few of my pieces hang around too. I'm quite proud of those. They're so surrealistic, and I'm always surprised to find that the brush that paints so smoothly is in my hand.
The muted tone of the band playing ukelele's and horns comes flooding out of doors and reaches my ears. I am on sitting on sun-warmed bricks, my fingers wrapped around my choker necklace, fiddling with the glassblown mushroom, trapped in a teardrop of glass. I watch as the sky floods through shades of color.

First the sky becomes a wash of blues, that fade to purple. A smashing pink lights up the horizon, purple candy clouds dance away from the sun. The sky fades to the most beautiful orange. "Thank you," I whisper. I knew God knows what my favorite color is, but I hardly realized that He loved to create the perfect orange, and to decorate the sky with it - just for me.
A man came and sat down next to me. "Beautiful, isn't it?"

"Mhm," I barely answer, lost in the beauty of the shifting oranges of the sky, the licorice and lavendar clouds, and the sweet scent of the sun-warmed evening.

The band had stopped playing, and I heard someone else strumming softly on his guitar, singing love songs or lullabies. His voice sounded like love itself as it is whispered to your heart. But his song ends, and I hear someone else play something more upbeat, on a soft electric. His voice sounds almost sad, and I feel suddenly as though my heart wants to know a thousand secrets, but has a thousand more to tell.
I suddenly realize I have been sitting for quite a long time, as my backside has lost all feeling on the hard, unforgiving brick.
I stand up, and lean against a wall; it's siding that has been painted purple, and decoratively painted with what looks like the potential for a faerie tale. I think it looks silly, but in the evening's glow, it somehow enchants me.
To the right of me is a low wall around the porch, between which I had been sitting on the steps. A cat is laying there, so lazy and self-satisfied. He has long gray fur, and his fluffy, ragged-looking tail flips about lazily, as if swatting something in his half-sleep. His fur rippples with his purring. I reach out and pet him.
I reach down, smoothing my sun-yellow skirt, then peer back at the boy who joined me. "What took you so long?"

-end part 1- (possibly more to come...)

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009


Sometimes, I wake up
and I realize that
something has been omitted.
It isn't missing
But it isn't there.
It's been deleted
but never on purpose
It was an accident.
It defied destiny.
and it continues to defy
what it was meant for.

Sometimes, as I fall asleep
I remember something
and I see past its deletion.
I grow sad as I think about
what had been
what could have been
and what, now, instead
is not.

Sometimes, when I'm dreaming
I forget what disappeared.
In dreaming, I find
that I have begun to live
as though it were.
I live in dreams
and dwell in warmth
I live that life,
and breathe that happiness.

But sometimes I wake up,
and I find the bed is cold
that the room is empty,
that the locket was dreamed
that you were not inside
and I was not in anyones arms.

Sometimes I wake
and in waking,
I still dream -
and the bed is warm
as if you were there,
and as if you still are here.

Sometimes I live.
and I go through my life,
forgetting the omitted,
and living all else that I know
I'm meant to have
and knowing who I'm meant to be
But the omitted is not filled.
merely ignored.

Sometimes I imagine.
But sometimes,
I imagine nothing at all.

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Lost Loves

Life sounds so lonely right now
The air is empty
and the space beside me is cold

Where did the warm air go?
The air so full of breath
so filled with laughter?

Why does it sound hollow?
The sound of laughter is gone
and I long to hear the crashing of waves

There is no music in the air
If only to hear a guitar strumming
filling the summer's night sky with life

To hear the sound of laughter!
The sound of dancing feet
To the song of life, and clapping hands

To feel the sand between my toes
and to feel the warmth of bodies all round
as their laughter makes the stars twinkle brighter

How I miss the stars in the sky
and the sand on which we laid,
and the loves with whom I could gaze

How I miss the breeze
and the arms around me
that kept me warm

How I miss those friends
who would play their songs
while I danced under nights blanket

The night has been long
but my heart hurts no more,
for I see the dawn breaking....

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

A Lonely Memory

There lingers a lonely feeling
A feeling of something forgotten
and yet undiscovered

There is a place in my heart
that is numb with cold
desperate for a retired warmth

There is something
so indescribable
though regrettably familiar

That feeling of complacency
suddenly is made worthless
and is happily forgot

I remember someone...
several people
and a love we shared

I remember friends
-what fools we were!-
the bond that was, ...still unsevered

I recall a life I had
and compare it 
to what I now have not

My heart mourns
that I have not these friends
that we share no laughter and tears

Something has gone missing
in my heart
and has yet to reappear

My friends, though good 
there were times 
when things were foul.

I wish for another chance
a chance with such fools as they
so I can laugh and cry and share again

We're all different now
and I know my self, my heart
so much better now...

But we've all gone our ways
and soon shall be long forgot,
though memories may stay fond

I hope this loneliness will leave
and I pray my heart will mend
for if it goes on, it will be my end

I yearn for something new,
something I've not yet had
but something old I miss so dear...

© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009

Wednesday, July 8, 2009


Many a time
Have I been foolish
In love before
But now all I can hope
Is that I will be foolish
No more
I pray my patience
And undying love
Will not be for naught
I hope that my prayers
For his rescue
Will find not be forgot
My hope for him is strong
And my prayers, concise,
Yet never too long
My heart for him is true
And my love,
Pierces through
His eyes, when ours meet
Are still recognizable
Though his words, at times, despise-able
Though he runs through chaos
Insecure, searching in vain
I have felt it all, all his pain
At present, though it seems
He has no resolve
Ah! Soon! Fear will soon dissolve
My heart is content
I have found rest, peace
For I know chaos will soon cease
© copyright by Michèle Aimée Lahaie, 2009